His wounds have paid my ransom

how deep the Father's love for us.

how vast beyond all measure.

that He should give His only son,

to make a wretch His treasure.

i am totally reminded of this sweet hymn as i sit beneath the mango tree, with the strong land breeze ripping through to meet the caribbean at midnight. walking back to my apartment on base, i just had to stop and take a moment to breathe in His love through a brief observation of the glorious night sky tonight. the stars are more brilliant than i've seen them before here, and i just feel God's love all the stronger when i look and know he created them for our pleasure. as i stopped where the sidewalk ended, about to cross the muddy drive into the hidden walkway between the staff apartments, i gazed up to the night sky to just soak in it's beauty; in God's perfect timing, a shooting star streaks across the patch i was looking at, and in one fell swoop, my heart melts. i am so in love with the Lord. and fortunately, this is a feeling, a romance, that is eternal; not marred by human error or pain and heartache. this is a love of heavenly proportion. one that never lets down, always satisfies. one that fights jealously over us. one that loves without condition or expectation. a generous love, that never fails and never gives up on us, no matter how many times we may get it wrong.

this week, the Lord has been really teaching me a ton about the depths of His love. i've just become so enthralled by His beauty, but have also realized just how much He delights over us; His creation, His love. He rejoices over us with singing. He pours His love out over us, because He wants us to delight in Him. this week, I've come to a further understanding of His love for us; an increase in intimacy with Him. the more of Him He pours out, the deeper in love I fall.

over the past 5 days, i feel like i've experienced the Lord's presence and love in entirely new ways. i'm left even more thirsty than before. i'm at a place of becoming fully satisfied in the Lord alone, yet never getting enough of Him. i feel like in this season, He's speaking tenderly to my heart. He's increasing my own capacity to love, and to be loved. honestly, time at the resort on sunday felt like such a refreshing revelation of His love through beauty of His creation. monday, we had a women's prayer meeting in which all the women were praying for their sisters to be greater than she. we prayed for the leaders, we prayed for their daughters. and then the teachers prayed for each other as others prayed around us. it was so, so powerful. we truly were in God's presence, and in that, my knowledge of and intimacy with the Lord was increased so greatly. i could just feel Him delighting over us; and in that, He increased my capacity for joy. smack dab in the center of His will and presence is where i always want to remain; especially after spending nearly three hours that night in prayer and agreement with so many new and different women on base.

i feel like the Lord might be speaking to me in other ways, too, but i'm still praying for spiritual wisdom and discernment, as well as confirmation, in hearing His voice. He is no doubt moving, but I don't want to mistakenly take my move over His, ever. He's seeming to speak to me in sweet, sweet ways, and I'm just praying for continued revelation in that, as well as understanding of it. God has set my heart a blaze, and i don't want to-- no, i can't-- go back to even just being content in where i'm at. i desire fresh manna for the day; not living off of what the Lord did yesterday or last week. and i am none the happier than when i am coming before Him, blessing Him with praise and seeking His face.

yesterday i spent a lot of time thinking about the way the God is moving in my life, and really putting some of the ideas (Godly ideas even) ahead of prioritizing Him. this is something i realized this morning at intercession and had to repent of, because if i am bowing down to hopes and dreams and ideas over the Lord, then it doesn't even matter if He gave them to me or not; they have become an idol. careful not to let them become that, i had to let it go immediately this morning.

this evening, we spent more time in worship and prayer, and i no doubt felt the Holy Spirit just make His presence known. just singing out sweet songs to Him brought so much joy to my heart, as I was reminded that He loves us so much more than we could ever love; desires a relationship with us such much more than we could ever want with him.

last night and tonight, we also had prayer/praise and worship meetings, and intercession this morning. it's been so great to be continuously surrounded by amazing people, grounded in their faith, speaking truth and encouragement into my life; the way we were called to live with others. i have definitely been blessed in ways i know i don't even deserve. just even tonight, one of the girls from the kona team prayed with me and affirmed that although it may seem that God called me here to teach, His plans are far more than that for me. it was so good and reassuring to hear those words, as they are something i've been feeling myself for the past month for certain.

***

i've been reading the book of daniel and after reading his prayer for the people in chapter 9, am fully convinced that's the next passage that the Lord has put on my heart to really dissect as i did with the red sea and exodus. i'm really excited to delve into the word, and i find myself more and more hungry after the scriptural revelations. i'm anxious to see what the Lord chooses to reveal to me through the scriptures, so definitely check back next week to see what i'm learning!

***

but above all else, this is what matters most: it is His love for us that covers all, makes all things new. and as we fully realize all that means, we are blessed beyond measure.

How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that helf Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom